In the morning i'll be better (written in 2015)

I guess when you're not in the best mood, you lose focus of the people that truly matter. When my aunt left us a couple of years ago, the realities of death really struck me for the first time. We were all huddled around her hospital bed and watching her slowly slip away from us as her breaths became weaker by the minute. I was unusually calm and composed//I wasn't in tears.

"this isn't her, she wouldn't be like this"

I vividly recall that the first time that it really hit me was when my sister showed up at the wake, arriving straight from the airport. It was way past midnight and I was sitting by myself at the round table still trying to process my thoughts. I suppose having Shalyn around just brought back so much memories of all of us together as my aunt was always watching out for us since we were kids. Seeing her tears welling up, I just lost it as well.